1. Mitron, since childhood I wanted to twist kangaroo’s ears!
Though holding and twisting Kangaroo’s ears may be tempting, you may injure yourself as Kangaroos are powerful animals.
2. Don’t take selfie when Whale is around
Ok. We know you love camera and would die to get yourself clicked. Just don’t take selfie when Whale is around, as they’ve no fucking idea about your popularity among Bhakts in India.
3. Stay away from Brett Lee
We don’t mind you claiming to have hit fours and sixes, but just don’t bat when Brett Lee is bowling.
4. No Bhashan on Beach, Please!
Just because you fooled people here doesn’t mean you should start giving Bhashans everywhere, especially when people are relaxing on beach.
5. Watersport may spoil your makeup, Avoid
Hard to give it a miss, but a big NO to watersport. Makeup you put on your hairs and face won’t love it. I heard dolphins out there hate fakers!
6. Don’t gift this Globe to Tony Abbott
We’re fan of your knowledge of geography (and history), but please don’t try to flaunt it before Australian PM Tony Abbott by gifting a Globe model like this. Not everybody takes shit!
7. Don’t bring 15000 Indian students on a single plane
We still remember your Rambo act during Uttarakhand floods…and appreciate it, but don’t bring all stranded Indian students (victim of racial abuse) on a single plane. Too risky!
8. Ask you fans to avoid photoshopping like this
A lot of hype would be created by Indian media. Your fans in India would be tempted to claim these penguins are wearing NaMo masks and dancing as you’re giving your charged speeches. Just ask them not to do it. We’ve had enough of weird photoshops.
9. Not too much wandering with your buddy
We’ve got plenty of business to do in Australia and don’t spend too much time wandering with your buddy – Adani. Get him some contracts, but not all.
10. Don’t say Sydney is part of Gujrat
Please don’t bring Amitabh Bachchan with with you to shoot an Ad film – Sydney: Yahan Khooshboo hai Gujrat ki…